Dedicated to the memory of the race-horse, Ruffian, who was the real Trooper.
Gloriosus
(Trumpet Fanfare)
The ACTION PACK
Presents
Another Gloriosus-Hammerhead Production
TEASER:
OPEN on a pastoral scene. On this clear day the sunlight
illuminated the grassy field where the wild flowers have started to bloom.
PAN RIGHT to reveal a magnificently appointed chariot being tended by a
slender driver while his well-dressed passenger and a rustically dressed
fellow stand by a chest-high timber fence. CLOSE IN on the figures as we
hear the ever increasing rumble of thundering hooves as teams of horses
race past the couple while towing the racing chariots behind them.
Subtitle appears: Potniae, Central Greece …
"The horses are looking good this year,
my King," remarked the rustic as he scratched his beard.
"Indeed Canthus?" asked King Glaucus,
looking at the trainer closely. "Are they truly fast enough to beat the
teams the other Kings would field at the games? Will they be able to beat
Diomedes' mares this season?"
"Oh, I'd say so, sire," Canthus assured
his worried sovereign. "I've yet to train a faster team of mares than those
you see before you pulling the white chariot. I don't think there are any
horses alive today that are faster than them."
"We shall see, for even now I have my
men scouring the countryside looking for promising candidates." The old
trainer looked sidelong at the king, and shrugged. He was the king, and
if he wanted to waste the effort on this useless quest, who was a trainer
to question him.
As the king turned to leave, he gave Canthus one last
order. "Oh yes, make sure the mares do not mate this season," at the trainers
startled glance, Glaucus explained. "I have it on good authority that frustrated
mares make the fastest runners." CUT TO a shot of the King's chariot retreating
into the distance with its passengers.
CUT TO a coalescence of light forming into the briefly clad, yet well-endowed,
figure of the Goddess of Love.
"Ex-squeeze me!" she exclaimed, "Have
you been listening to Poseidon again? That is SO not how it works!" As
Aphrodite fumed, her body trembled with fury at the thought that her mares
wouldn't be given the chance to mate this year. "Ooooh, if your wife hadn't
already run off with someone else I'd make you sorry!" she yelled, shaking
her fist at his rapidly disappearing form. She then pulled her translucent
robe about her as she gathered herself and looked back at the racing teams.
A mischievous smile crossed her features."Well, I'll teach you, Glaucus,"
she promised, "I'll teach you a lesson you'll NEVER forget." And she disappears
in a burst of light.
CUT TO: Argo and Ruffian enjoying a leisurely lunch. CLOSE UP of Argo's
head as she munches. A breeze blows, and the mare's ears twitched as she
looked up. PULL BACK to reveal a smiling Aphrodite standing before the
golden mare.
"Hello Argo," said the goddess, "I need
a favor."
Music swells and OPENING TITLES -
A lone equine figure in a verdant field, as clouds billow and rush overhead,
"In a time of Myth and Legend, of Spirits and Demigods …"
Shot of a team of horses pulling a chariot, "… A horse was considered
nothing but a beast of burden …"
Now a galloping Argo, in full harness, fording a stream with the warrior
princess on her back, "… but one would challenge this assumption …"
Title Display: ARGO, MARE OF JUSTICE
Shot of a galloping Argo with Autolycus riding her barebacked, "… She
was Argo, Mare of Justice …"
A shot of a galloping Chestnut Mare, "… The Passion …"
A PAN-SHOT of a herd of wild horses streaming across the screen, "…
The Fury …"
Poseidon rising out of the surf before a challenging Argo, "… The Danger
…"
CLOSE-UP of Argo rearing against a reddening sky, " … Her courage will
change the world."
ACT ONE
The camera follows Ruffians path as she canters over to
her companion while we hear Aphrodite talking with Argo.
Subtitles sequentially appear:
THE MARES OF GLAUCUS
Written by Gloriosus and LRMS
Guest Starring:
Alexandra Tydings
Clayton Moore
Adrian Paul
LMRS
"Hello there, Argo," Aphrodite crowed.
"Remember me? Aphrodite? Goddess of Love? Yeah, I know. Xena wasn't too
fond of me. Well, I'm fond of you. I was impressed by the way you made
a complete fool out of Discord a while back. She was trying to find out
who killed that bounty hunter, whats-her-face. Turned out it was you. I'll
always remember when she shouted, 'I don't do animals!' Ha! I laughed so
hard I nearly wet myself.
"Anyway, I hear that you've been making
a reputation for yourself now that Xena's gone. I was sorry to hear that
the warrior princess croaked. I really was. Mind you, I'm just a little
ticked off that your recent antics have kept her reputation going. A lot
of people believe that she rides you still. That she's still involved in
the affairs of the mortal world through her mighty horse.
"I don't know if I like that. I still
remember when a bunch of kids defaced my temple. They wrote all over the
walls, 'Elect Xena God' and other such nonsense. What did they shout as
they ran out? 'Xena rules! Aphrodite blows!' Now that wasn't funny in the
least.
"Yeah, I know. I'm prattling on and
on. You must excuse me, I'm new at asking animals for a favor. If it were
any other horse, and any other situation, I wouldn't even bother. But it's
a special situation, and you're a special horse, so here we are.
"Okay, okay. You want me to get to the
point? Fine. Here's the deal."
Gloriosus
5-10 second Shot of Argo and Ruffian standing there, nodding occasionally, as Aphrodite gesticulates wildly. Meanwhile the clouds stream overhead time-dilation style, to indicate passage of time.
CUT TO a CLOSE-UP of Aphrodite speaking:
"… and so Glaucus, that's the king,
he's like so wrapped up in this racing thing, that he's not allowing his
mares to mate, believing it'll make them more spirited, or run faster,
or some such thing," concluded Aphrodite to the disbelieving snorts of
the horses. "TELL me about it," she said, rolling her eyes. "So will you
help me?" asked the scantily-clad goddess, batting her eyelashes at the
mares.
Argo looked over at Ruffian who neighed and nodded vigorously.
Argo turns back to the goddess, and whinnies her assent. "Kewl! I've always
said you were the brains behind the warrior princess!" Aphrodite gushed,
as Argo pawed the ground and looked away, embarrassed.
CUT TO two mounted agents appearing in the distance, just cresting a
hill.
CUT TO the horses, as Aphrodite says "Well … gotta go. People to do,
and events to arrange. Tah-TAH," and she vanishes with a flash.
Argo turned back to Ruffian, *Are you sure about this?*
Ruffian snorted again, as she nuzzled Argo's shoulder,
*It sounds like a hoot. Plus we get to strike a blow for truth, justice,
and the equine way!*
Argo gave her companion a long look, *I think you need
to work on your motto.*
Ruffian whinnied and began to canter towards the distant
agents, *Hey, I'm a horse, not a bard.*
OPEN ON a brightly colored, columned throne-room, painted frescoes decorate
the walls, and a powerfully built figure sits upon the throne, attended
by his aged advisor. The surf is heard in the background, and the
clear blue skies are visible through the windows.
Subtitle appears: Bistone, Thrace ...
"Oh, were it but spring!" lamented the
royally garbed figure to his minister.
"Your majesty?" asked the bemused minister.
"Here I am, the master of the most spirited
horses in the civilized world, and the closest games are nigh a month away."
King Diomedes explained as he shrugged his heavy mantle from his shoulders,
and looked out the window towards the Thracian shoreline. "I'm afraid that
Lightning and Thought will waste away from lack of competition."
"Oh, I'm sure there is no threat of
that, your highness," assured Menoetes confidently. "What with their
diet of man-flesh, and the exercises you put them through, they will most
certainly be ready for any competition."
"But I do not want to wait!" growled
the king, chewing his thumbnail. At his minister's "Ahem," he stopped,
and pulled his hand away. "Certainly there must be some funeral games we
can attend, hmmm? Some noble cousin certainly died, or something?"
The aged minister, simply shook his head and hid a smile.
"I'm afraid not your majesty, they all seem to be in excellent health."
"Well, I'm just going to have to see
about that," Diomedes paused in thought as his counselor looked at him
with wide eyes. "Maybe Pelias," the King mused. "He's certainly made no
friends since he usurped the throne of Thessaly."
"Your Majesty!" exclaimed Menoetes in
shocked tones.
Diomedes seemed to take notice again of his advisor, "Oh,
peace, peace, Menoetes, my friend. I'm just engaging in an idle notion,.
Nothing to worry about, I won't do anything rash." At his monarch's assurances
and dismissal, the minister bowed and backed out of the throne room, while
the king returned to his surf-watching. "Yes," he rumbled to himself. "I
think the death of King Pelias will do most nicely."
Answering him on the wind (faint voice over by Aphrodite)
"And you'll get yours too, bub."
End ACT ONE
Gloriosus
ACT TWO
CUT TO INTERIOR STABLES ...
King Glaucus had been summoned by a messenger bringing
word of his agent's success.
As he entered the stables he stopped and stared at the
captured Chestnut mare. "Where did you find her?" He asked awestruck.
"Out on the plains west of here, sire,"
replied the agent, obviously pleased with his monarch's delight.
The old king carefully made his way around the horse,
"Pale forelock, white star, stockings on the rear legs, and a beautifully
proportioned body. I'd swear she was Ruffian."
Both the agent and trainer looked surprised, "Ruffian?
Certainly she's retired by now?" Ventured Canthus, not wishing to disillusion
his king.
"No, no ... I'm sure of it. I made a
fortune betting on her, and always thought King Idomaneus had retired her
a few years prematurely," mused Glaucus, as he moved to check Ruffian's
teeth. Ruffian snorted and backed away, and the King laughed, patting the
mare's snout affectionately. "That's right Ruffian, a lady never reveals
her age." He turned to the stable-hands and directed that Ruffian be quartered
and fed the finest oats they had on hand. "You take good care of her, you
hear? She still has some races left in her."
CUT TO the lone figure of Argo trotting across the plains making her
way to the stables of King Glaucus.
*I can't believe Ruffian, that little
git, just volunteering her own captivity. Is that smart? No. Is that clever?
No. Any man with common sense should have shied away from so forward a
mare. But do they? NO.* grumbled Argo as she continued forward. *Isn't
that just like a male, to take the first good-looking filly who shows the
slightest bit of willingness.*
LMRS
Argo contemplated the bottle of perfume Aphrodite gave
her. *I don't like working with magic. I wouldn't do it if there were any
other way to help my fellow mares.*
King Glaucus was once again inspecting his horses in one
of his stables. He was happy with what he saw. Canthus wasn't too sure.
"The horses seem restless," the trainer
said. "This isn't good."
Glaucus shook his head. "Nothing that can't be whipped
out of them. You handle the horses the way I say, and..." Glaucus looked
over at the stable door. He saw a beautiful lady in a diaphanous gown.
She was just standing there, looking at him. "And who is this?" The king
asked.
"Who is who?" The trainer asked.
"The beautiful lady standing by the
door."
"That's no lady," Canthus said. "That's
a horse."
Glaucus gave the old man a look. "Not funny, Canthus.
That's insulting our..."
Glaucus looked again. There was indeed a Palomino standing
there by the door. A beautiful horse, but no woman in any way, shape, or
form.
Glaucus ordered the horse stabled. Then he went off to throw some cold
water on his face. The day must have been more tiring than he had suspected.
That night found King Glaucus restless. He had enough of
tossing and turning in his bed. He finally got up, slipped on a robe, and
set off for the stables. He couldn't help himself. It was as though the
sirens that once plagued brave Ulysses were calling him. He entered the
stable to once again behold the beautiful lady he saw before. Curiously,
she was standing in one of the stalls. He apologized to her as he let her
out. "I knew I had seen you. But the next time I looked, you were a....Oh...Never
mind. It's just that..."
The woman smiled, and ran out of the stable. She took
off at an amazing speed. Glaucus took off after her.
As he chased her through the woods, he had difficulty
seeing what he was chasing. As the form raced past one tree, she was a
horse. After slipping past another, she was a woman.
Glaucus continued running, but he didn't tire. Normally,
a run like this would leave him out of breath. But this time, he seemed
to grow stronger with every step. In fact, he realized that he seemed to
be leaping through the woods...as though he was...galloping!
Glaucus stopped. The female he was chasing stood in the
forest awaiting him. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever beheld,
with her flowing mane, and muscled flanks. It aroused him to no end.
He stampered in astonishment as he looked down at himself.
He saw his black, equine body. He felt his tail wag in terror. Was his
senses deceiving him? Had King Glaucus indeed transformed into a horse?
END ACT TWO
Gloriosus
ACT THREE
Argo gazed at him serenely. The moon shone down through
the forest canopy, lighting the scene, and as Glaucus composed himself,
the golden mare turned around, flirtatiously flicked her tail at him, and
took off. The king couldn't help himself, he took off after her. Never
had he desired so bad as he did this palomino. Again they raced through
the woods, and back into the fields, he keeping apace of her as she delightedly
ran on.
Through the night they cavorted, playing tag with each
other as the sovereign let his senses go, believing that he had fallen
into a divine dream. Gradually, they made their way back to the palace
grounds, with Argo returning to her stall, and Glaucus returning to his
chambers, falling into a deep and relaxing sleep.
CUT TO Morning on the training field. CAMERA PANS to follow Glaucus
driving a chariot around the track only to stop on Argo and Ruffian being
harnessed for the first time to a chariot. The palomino pawed the ground
as the thoroughbred patiently stood as the grooms set the bridles, harnesses,
and reins.
*Enjoy your romp?* asked the chestnut.
*Actually, yes,* admitted Argo. *I just
wish these people would hurry up.*
Ruffian snorted, *Whoa … slow down a bit. Pulling a chariot
is nothing like running cross-country. These adjustments are as much for
our benefit as they are for the driver's control.*
*So we're dragging a cart? What of it?*
Ruffian looked at her companion, *It's not a cart, it
is a chariot. And when we race, we must be able to match our paces. Whoops
… here comes the trainer. Now, remember, pay attention to the driver and
our rhythm, and don't be rattled by our counterparts pulling the other
chariots.*
FADE TO Canthus, who approaches Glaucus still in his chariot, while
they watch the mares being put through their paces.
"I don't know sire, there's something
about those two horses," Canthus admitted as he looked out on the field.
"They seem more … I don't know … with it?"
"Well, they do seem to have a mind of
their own," observed Glaucus. "But that's not always a bad thing. And it
looks as if Argo is receiving instructions from Ruffian."
"Indeed. She is improving with every
circuit. How did you settle on the name Argo, for the palomino?"
The king shrugged, "Something in a dream, I guess. Anywise,
she looks like an 'Argo'." Canthus laughed with his sovereign. The King
certainly looked better rested today, than he had recently, and he drove
far more steadily than had the past few years. "Oh, yes, Canthus; I'm having
the carpenters come over to the stables to see if we can get some louvered
shutters installed to replace the old solid ones. The stables struck me
as being rather stuffy."
WIPE TO Nighttime …
Glaucus felt young again, chasing after this golden-haired
nymph through the woods. His feet flowed over the tangled roots, rocks
and vines like water, sure-footed and never tangling. The nymph became
a golden-mare, and Glaucus the black stallion, as the chased each other,
reveling in the freedom the night had brought. The mare ducked behind some
shrubbery and returned to her nymph form. From behind a tree, she leaned
out and smiled at the King.
Glaucus rushed forward to catch her, only to feel her
silky hair brush by him, leaving an intoxicating scent, when she ducked
under his grasping arms. The King gripped the trunk and swung himself around
to see the lovely palomino galloping off into the woods.
With a joyous laugh, he galloped after her.
FADE TO Daytime …
Ruffian nuzzles Argo after their last practice race around
the track. *Argo, you really mustn't be startled when the other horses
take off at the same time we do.*
Argo shakes her head. *I don't know. I feel like a panic
attack coming on when that happens.*
Ruffian snorted her amusement at Argo's observation. *But
that is part of the joy of racing! The surge of adrenaline, the excitement,
the tension, and the final release; nowhere else can you experience those
sensations.*
Argo just looked at her companion.
*All right, almost nowhere else.* Admitted
Ruffian to her companion's amusement.
CUT TO Nighttime …
CAMERA PANS through the forest following the golden mare and black
stallion as they race through the woods.
Glaucus was again frolicking with Argo, while they were
racing North and East towards the Thessalian Border. In between their sprints,
the two would revert to their laughing human forms. The blond nymph swathed
in diaphanous robes would squeal with delight as she again narrowly eludes
the king.
The sovereign himself delighted in his renewed vigor and
suppleness of his limbs, it was almost as if he was reborn with every re-occurrence
of this dream ….
LMRS
All this time, Glaucus was aware of this fragrance. Where
had he sensed it before? Yes, it was in the air the first time he had encountered
the girl. And he now realized it was in the air every time he had beheld
her. Now the fragrance was all around him. Was this the reason for all
this? Was Glaucus under an enchantment?
*Please, help me! They plan to kill
him!*
That voice? It seemed to come from the horse.
*Look beyond! That man is in danger!*
Glaucus looked to see Pelias of Thessaly riding through
the night. He was being pursued by two men on horseback. Where were his
guards? Where was his protection? How could this happen to one such as
he?
Glaucus and his equine companion gave chase. Soon they
were galloping straight for Pelias's attackers. They successfully spooked
their horses, causing them to turn tail and flee.
"King Glaucus!" Pelias cried as he dismounted.
"Thank the gods for your timely intervention. But how did you arrive so?"
Glaucus looked to see Pelias. He then looked at himself.
He stood on two legs, and was quite his old self again. "Pelias? What have
I just done?"
"Done?" Pelias snorted. "Why, you ran
over here like a madman, and scared my attackers. You and that horse."
Glaucus turned around. He saw the palomino galloping off.
Gloriosus
Behind him the King of Potniae heard a thump, and turning
back the old king saw Pelias staring wide-eyed at the arrowhead projecting
from his chest. "I should have known it wouldn't have been so easy." The
Thessalian gasped, as he collapsed, Glaucus catching him.
"Who would have done this?" asked Glaucus.
Pelias looked up at him through rapidly fading eyes, a
last glimmer flashing as he managed "Diomedes ... (gasp) Honor me, good
Glaucus, and (wheeze) my thanks for what you've tried (gasp) to do. Make
sure I am ... avenged."
Glaucus' eyes flashed in anger as he heard, the Thracian's
name, "I will, Pelias, rely on it," he promised softly, holding the dead
monarch tightly. Off in the distance he heard the frantic cries of his
men searching for him.
_____________________________________________
CUT TO the race track.
The next day Glaucus reined in his horses, bringing his
chariot to a halt in front of Canthus.
"What is happening?" asked the Trainer.
"Diomedes," growled the King, Ruffian's
ear twitched at the sound of that name. "He had Pelias killed."
"The Thessalian upstart?"
"The very one, so I sent messengers
to Acastus, Pelias' son, to inform him of his father's fate, and to arrange
the funeral games to honor his dead sire."
_____________________________________________
CUT TO interior stables.
Later that evening, Argo was trying to talk sense into
her companion. *Ruffian, what is with you? We do not have to race, that's
why Glaucus has all these other horses.*
*We're racing!* Ruffian insisted stubbornly.
*We are NOT racing!* Argo rebutted,
*We are here to reform the King, and change his ways.*
*And this will best be done by racing!*
*No it will not!* Argo whinnied in frustration.
*Yes it will! And what makes you think this
just concerns Glaucus?* asked Ruffian.
Argo paused, *Well, Aphrodite said --*
*-- I heard what Aphrodite said, and
what Glaucus proposed crossed the line. But he isn't the only one who does
this sort of thing.* Ruffian explained as Argo nickered her disapproval.
*Listen mate,* snorted Ruffian. *You haven't raced, so you don't know how
it is. But there is nothing that can compare to the thrill of chariot racing.
The perfect blend of man, machine and two horses working as one. And while
chariot racing tends to highlight the technology and the driver's skills,
it still boils down to the horses' strength, speed and desire to win. It's
as thrilling to the driver as it is for the horses, and the drivers are
by their very nature enthusiasts and very competitive.
*Now Glaucus favors the Egyptian-style
chariot, it's lightweight, the better for us, and it grips the turns far
better than the either the Greek or Persian-styles. Plus, I've been watching
the king, the old fellow can DRIVE!*
Argo regarded her companion solemnly, *but why are you
so insistent on running this race?*
Ruffian sighed deeply as she slowly munched her oats.
*It was me last race. King Idomaneus was driving and I was paired with
me mate, Trooper.*
FADE TO SEPIA-TONED FLASHBACK (maybe stock footage from Ben-Hur) with
Ruffian's Voice Over.
*We were running hub-to-hub with Diomedes
and his mares, Thought and Lightning, going for all get out … and it was
going around that last turn when it happened. Diomedes left his lane and
cut us off, and in the process shattered Troopers' right foreleg. Oh we
tried to hang on … Trooper running all out on only three legs, me matching
her pace, all the while King Idomaneus was trying to rein us in. But we'd
be damned if we'd let that THRACIAN and his unnatural mares beat us …*
CUT TO Ruffian and Argo, back in the stables.
*In the end, they did … Trooper died,
and I was retired.* Ruffian turned to her companion. *Don't you see? I
OWE that Thracian bastard for what he did, and I want to show the world
that you don't have to resort to unnatural methods to better our performance.
Just treat us right and be a competent driver, and WE'LL win them races
for you!*
Ruffian looked away, embarrassed by her outburst, as her
friend nuzzled her in sympathy. *I'm sorry, I had no idea that this meant
that much to you.*
Ruffian snorted in derision, *Well, unless you were on
the racing circuit, you wouldn't know.* The other mares whinnied their
agreement and sympathy. Finally Ruffian turned back to Argo. *But now do
you understand why we HAVE to race? Why we HAVE to WIN?*
Argo breathed a ragged sigh as she nodded. *We will. For
you, for Trooper, and for racing horses everywhere, we will.*
CUT TO exterior Stables, as a neigh of exultation filled the air.
END ACT THREE
LMRS
ACT FOUR
The following day was that of fanfare and festivals. Despite
the horrendous circumstances that brought it on, the crowds that gathered
knew that this would be a chariot race to watch and enjoy.
In the background, storm clouds were brewing over the
heads of the arguing royalty. "You can't prove any of this!" King Diomedes
yelled. "You only have the words of a dying old man. He could not have
known who was truly behind his attack."
"The King of Potniae points to you from
the grave!" King Glaucus remarked. "And I will see to it that justice is
done. Even if it means war between our kingdoms."
Diomedes demurred, "It need not go to that. Let the chariot
race decide. If I lose, I will allow for an impartial investigation into
my affairs. If I win, you will drop the matter entirely. In this way, we
may hope to prevent further bloodshed."
King Glaucus didn't like this bargain, but shook on it
all the same. "Then let the horses decide the outcome. Let the games begin."
Gloriosus
CUT TO the tent of Glaucus.
A track tout came into Glaucus' tent, as the king and
his men made ready. "Ah ... good morning sire, I'm pleased you could come
out to the games. Would you like to judge the chariot races?"
Glaucus issued a short bark of laughter. "Actually, young
man, I'm entering them," the king informed the astonished official.
After the tout gulped for some air, he checked his racing
tablet, "By the gods ... I ...You're registered all right. But ..." pulling
himself together, "So you'll be racing with which horses?" the tout managed
to ask, as he prepared to make the notes on his wax tablet, only to have
it falling out of his trembling hands as he heard the monarch's answer.
"Ruffian and Argo are my team."
"Ruffian?" the official squeaked, "I
thought she was retired."
"Hardly," the king laughed, "as will
be proved in today's race."
Quickly picking up his dropped board, the young tout began
making the proper notations with his stylus as he rushed out muttering,
"Oh, the wagers are going to be flying today!"
CUT TO Diomedes; the CAMERA PANS following his progress out of Glaucus
camp and comes to rest on a pair of horses.
*Is that him?* asked the golden mare.
*Ooh, yas!* the chestnut confirmed.
*Mark him well Argo, THERE is a man who'll stop at nothing to win a race.*
Ruffian then noticed an excited crowd approaching. *Uh-oh ... fans!*
Argo held herself up proudly, *I'll try not to disappoint.*
"Hey look," one of the excited fans
exclaimed, "it IS Ruffian."
Punctuated with a joyous shriek, a babble of voices filled
the air, as the crowd rushed forward, trying to draw as near as Glaucus'
groomsmen would let them, to view the legendary racer, while a bemused
Argo looked on.
CUT TO a coalescence of Pink Light ...
"Ooooh ... I just love it when a plan
comes together," chortled Aphrodite. "This is going to be so much fun!"
CUT TO the racing board, as the touts announced who were to be racing,
along with the teams.
"Acastus of Thessaly, driving Rumor
and Panic;" A cheer went up.
"Hippolytus of Attika, driving Poseidonis
and Edindale;" the announcer paused to allow for the applause.
"Medon of Phokis, driving Zephyr and
Borealis;" (applause)
"Strophion of Locris, driving Harpy
and Typhoon;" (applause)
"Agathocles of Syracuse, driving Bucephalus
and Winged Fury;" (applause)
"Xanthippus of Phrygia, driving Hermes
and Hera's Wrath; (applause)
"Diomedes of Thrace, driving Lightning
and Thought;" (silence, interrupted by the occasional boo's and hisses)
"And, here's a surprise ladies and gentlemen,
from those thrilling days of yesteryear, we have Glaucus--" a sustained
cheer went up at the mention of the old king's name, "and ... and ... will
you guys be quiet! and he's driving ... Argo and Ruffian!" An even louder
cheer arose, especially from the older fans. The bookies went about, as
markers were placed and bets made. The announcers took their place, as
the drivers and groomsmen checked the chariots, horses, bridles and other
gear, prior to the final preparations for the race. Along the racetrack,
the banners of the respective nations snapped in the stiff northerly breeze.
LMRS
Diomedes mused over Glaucus' choice of horses. "Ruffian
huh? She was put out to pasture long ago. The same goes for her rider.
What is Glaucus trying to prove?"
"That's not all, sire," an advisor said.
"I understand that the palomino with him is named Argo."
"A good name," Diomedes said. "Jason
himself saw fit to use it for his ship."
"Xena herself saw fit to use it for
her horse!"
Diomedes was startled by those words. He looked over at
the object of conversation again. "Are you suggesting that..."
"The mare fits our description of the
beast," said the advisor. "And wherever she is, the warrior princess cannot
be far behind."
"According to my reports, Xena is dead."
"I have heard that too. Yet word has
it that she continues to help those in need. Some say she does it through
her horse, if you can believe that."
Diomedes gave this great thought. He didn't want the fabled
warrior princess on his back whether she was living or dead. The race had
yet to start, and already it was full of surprises. He swore to take steps
to prevent any more.
Gloriosus
CUT TO the ceremonial platform …
The various aides filled the gold cups of their respective monarchs
and champions as the Thessalian priest began the ritual libations.
Lifting his cup in the air, the priest intoned: "To King
Pelias, may you find pleasure in witnessing these games that we hold in
your honor and memory." The drivers lift their cups, and hailed "To Pelias!"
and took their first drink.
Lifting his cup a second time, the priest intoned: "To
our noble participants, your coming out in respect to our departed sovereign
honors him, and his kingdom."
"To the city of Iolkis, and Thessaly,
may your years be prosperous." Responded the contestants, and took their
second pull at the cup. The aides refilling, when the vessel was emptied.
Lifting his cup for a third time, the priest intoned:
"And finally, to the Gods, may they smile in favor on us this day."
CUT TO Aphrodite enjoying a honey soaked, sesame seed confection.
Voice Over of the Contestants' "To the Gods!"
"Oh don't you worry honey," Aphrodite
assured them. "We do."
CUT TO Glaucus' Pavillion.
After the king had inspected and assured the horses, they
were harnessed to the king's chariot, the spar running between them, and
they stood patiently, as the reins were fitted to them and draped back
into the vehicle. Glaucus checked the fastenings of the under-carriage
and dabbed a bit more grease to the axle, while Canthus hovered nearby.
"Are you sure you're up to this, sire?"
asked the trainer, worriedly.
"Never more sure in my life," responded
the old-king as he tested the hub-pegs. "I'll show that young punk, Diomedes,
that he can't do his dirty work in my kingdom and get away with it!" The
king then stood up as his trainer threaded the securing strap through his
riding belt. Mounting his chariot, he secured the ends of the straps to
the two anchor points that were mounted on his chariot's frame. "Come on
Ruffian, Argo," coaxed the monarch. "Let's show them what we can do."
The horses then wheeled the chariot out, joining the other
contestants on their way to the starting line.
CUT TO The barkers warming up the crowd, as the final wagers are made
and registered.
CUT TO the horses, as they greet Ruffian and inquire after her new
"trainee."
Prancing to the starting line, were Diomede's mares,
Thought and Lightning. *Stand aside everyone,* began Thought, *We take
large steps.* finished Lightning, pompously, as they pulled up next to
Argo and Ruffian.
Argo snorted her contempt, *What a pair
of blowhards*
Ruffian nodded in agreement, *Well, what did you expect
of mares fed on human flesh?*
Argo's ears pricked up in astonishment, *I thought you
were just being mean, when you called them unnatural.*
*Uh-uh … with those two, unnatural is
what they are, and unnatural is what I call them.*
CUT TO Diomedes and Glaucus.
"You should have stayed retired, old
man," Diomedes shouted over the crowd noise. "You and that old nag don't
stand a chance."
"Then you better stay out of my way
junior! I wouldn't want to run you over." Returned the king spiritedly.
A hush fell over the crowd, as the nervous tension filled
the air.
CUT TO the trumpeters, lifting their celtic horns. The starting notes sound, and the chariots take off in a cloud of dust, and the thundering sound of hoof-beats.
Gloriosus
CLOSE-UP of the starting line as the horns sound.
"AND THEY'RE OFF!" shouts the Barker
for the benefit of the less sharp-eyed patrons of the race. "Acastus, Glaucus,
and Diomedes take an early lead, closely followed by Agathocles and Hippolytus,
with Strophion, Medon and Xanthippus bring up the rear of the pack."
CUT TO the race in progress, with the Barker's description provided
as a Voice Over.
"The contestants are now jockeying for
position as they go into the first turn, and OH! Strophion's chariot flipped,
and he's left in the dust as Medon and Xanthippus zip past. LOOK AT THAT!
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm looking at as pretty a piece of driving as I
ever did see. Glaucus just threaded his way between Acastus and Diomedes
as nice as you please, and barely missed being clipped by Agathocles."
CLOSE UP of Diomedes as a mixed expression of fury and admiration crosses
his features as he watches Glaucus take the lead.
Hearing his left hub scrape, the Thracian looked over
to see Acastus crowding him as the maneuvered for the straightaway.
CLOSE UP of Glaucus, as he quickly checks on his pursuers. A look of pure delight is on his face as he snaps his reins and shouts: "On Ruffian! On Argo! Go go go go!"
CLOSE UP of the horses, as their ears pricked up at his urgings.
*Hey Argo! Want to show them what we
really got!*
Argo snorted, *WHAT do you mean, "really got?!"*
*Let's pick up the pace!* Urged Ruffian,
as she did just that.
Argo kept up, flipping her ears back as she eyed the straightaway
they were on.
CUT TO a shot of the lead three. ZOOMING OUT to take in the entire pack
as the narration continues.
(Voice Over) "OK, right now the pack
is led by Glaucus, with Ruffian and Argo; Acastus and Diomedes are following
with Medon competing with Hippolytus, Agathocles, and Xanthippus for the
outside lanes as they look forward to the next turn. Glaucus makes the
turn! And it looks as if Diomedes is tangled up with Acastus! OH NO! Hippolytus
just ran into Medon, causing them both to spin off the track! Now it's
Agathocles and Xanthippus bring up the rear. Ladies and Gentlemen, now
three charioteers are out of the race!
"Diomedes is now separating himself
from Acastus as he moves to catch up with the King of Potniae on the final
leg. However, Acastus is keeping the distance close! Agathocles and Xanthippus
are now running hub to hub, as the racers now enter the final straightaway
on the course! Diomedes is making the all out effort now, Acastus is barely
keeping ahead of Agathocles and Xanthippus, but despite Diomedes's best
effort, it looks as if Glaucus is pulling away! This is incredible folks!
A driver out of retirement, managing an unknown and a retired mare, has
been leading this race all along, and looks to finish - OH, he hit a rock
on the course - Glaucus is now balancing on one wheel, trying to control
his chariot. I tell you, the groundskeepers should be executed if anything
should happen. Glaucus is all but hanging out of the upper edge, trying
to right his chariot! Diomedes has caught up! Now it's Diomedes and Glaucus.
Glaucus and Diomedes, as the Potniaean brings his vehicle down onto both
wheels. Glaucus and Diomedes, Diomedes and Glaucus, this is the time for
the final efforts. It's going to be close … It's close folks! HO! The flag's
waved, and … Glaucus wins!"
A cheer emanates from the crowd, as the official raised Potniae's flag in signal of Glaucus' win.
LMRS
"Glaucus cheated," Diomedes shouted at
his soldiers. "He had help from the warrior princess herself. And I mean
to prove it! I want you men to search the grounds. Check ever member of
the audience before they disperse. One of them must be Xena. Find her!"
Diomedes stormed alone to his stable where he shouted
at his horses. "You two nags should have been put to sleep seasons ago
judging by the poor sport you gave today! By the gods, you should be fed
to men rather than the other way around!"
His tirade continued, angering the horses. Not only were
they getting angry, they were getting hungry. And Diomedes was alone with
them. If they must be put to sleep, Thought and Lightning figured that
they ought to go on full stomachs.
Diomedes didn't even have time to pull out his sword.
He did scream once. It was barely heard outside.
END ACT FOUR
LMRS
ACT FIVE
King Glaucus had just unhooked the horses from his
chariot when a young messenger ran to him with the news.
"Your highness," the young man cried.
"Diomedes' horses are on a rampage! They've just killed and eaten Diomedes
himself. Now they're running around loose, trampling anyone in their path.
The soldiers can't stop them!"
Argo and Ruffian took off to face Thought and Lightning.
If it's a battle the two unnatural beasts wanted, they were going to get
it.
Gloriosus
CUT TO: Argo, breathing heavily, trotting up to Diomedes' pavilion with
Ruffian close behind. About the stables are a bunch of upset grooms wringing
their hands, and peering in anxiously, while a bunch of soldiers were on
the ground, moaning and being bandaged up.
Upon entering the stables, Argo and Ruffian find themselves
face-to-face with Thought, as in the background we hear chomping noises,
as Lightning gnaws at that last bit of bone.
*Oh, hello, Ruffian,* greeted Thought
pleasantly, *I see you haven't lost a step.* Argo and Ruffian stopped in
astonishment at this observation. *I DO hope you and the newbie haven't
come to gloat, I find gloating to be most distasteful.*
*Well, your distaste didn't stop you
from gloating the last time we met!* challenged the Chestnut.
*Well, of course not. We had won then,*
Thought remarked in surprise, astonished that this had to be pointed out.
*Oh, Lightning … we have visitors.* With a hearty "P-too" Lightning turned
around.
Argo looked at the two dark horses with a mixture of disgust
and surprise. *But why did you consume your Master?* she asked, as nothing
else occurred to her.
Lightning snorted as Thought answered for them both *Oh,
that! Well the brute had the temerity to suggest that it was OUR fault
that you had won the race. When anyone with half a brain would had noticed
it was his lousy driving. In fact, we'd have won if Diomedes had bothered
to steer clear of Acastus.*
*Yeah, right, and if we hadn't have
hit the rock, we'd have won by a length instead of a nose,* Ruffian returned
tartly.
Lightning and Thought looked at each other and apparently
shrugged, *True, true, and were "if's" and "but's" grain, we'd all eat
our fill.* The four horses snorted in amusement. *By the bye, you wouldn't
happen to know someone who is in need of a pair of championship mares,
would you?*
This time Argo and Ruffian looked at each other, and Argo
reluctantly volunteered *Well … maybe King Glaucus would … but you would
have to give up dining on human flesh.*
Thought and Lightning nodded, *Oh definitely. After Diomedes,
I could settle down for a lifetime of oats.* And at that, the four mares
went trotting out to Glaucus' pavilion, as Diomedes' retainers followed
in a line, uncertain what to do.
CUT TO the Celebration.
Glaucus is gathering the acclaim of the crowd. "Brilliant
driving's" and "Stupendous race's" were shouted out at the old king, as
he held up his hands to quiet them.
"Thank you, my friends, but I must confess
a secret." The crowd leaned in closer as they held their collective breath,
Glaucus paused for a moment to keep them in suspense, and then announced,
"I could not have won this race without the excellent running of my mares:
Ruffian and Argo." The crowd went wild.
With the flower garlands about their necks, Argo and Ruffian
managed to look bashful, and allowed the congratulatory pats that the crowd
bestowed upon them. With Thought and Lightning safely ensconced in Glaucus'
encampment, their thoughts could now turn towards their own futures. *Well
Ruffian, was that enough racing to suit you.*
Ruffian snorted and rubbed her nuzzle against Argo's *Yes,
it just feels so much better to retire on a win. And THAT was a race these
people will remember.*
*It was at that,* agreed Argo, and after
the celebration, and after a little bit of help from a certain Goddess,
the two mares galloped off into the sunset.
FREEZE FRAME of Argo and Ruffian against the setting sun, (Voice Over
by Aphrodite)
After that race, King Glaucus would go on to treat his
mares properly to the end of his days; Thought and Lightning continued
to provide wins for their new owner's family, and were most happy eating
the grain they were provided.
Acamus, had received justice for his father's murder,
and through acclamation ascended to the Throne of Thessaly, ever advised
to avoid his father's mistakes and pay Hera her due. Thus, I paid off my
favor to Hera.
Glaucus's son, Bellerophon, would have to learn his lessons
the hard way; but that is another story.
And as for Argo and Ruffian, w-e-l-l, let's just say,
that from that day on, in the racing circles, they would be forever known
as the Mares of Glaucus.
Subtitle sequentially appears: THE END
Gallop on Argo!
_____________________________________________
Starring:
Argo (V.O.) - Melinda Clark
Ruffian (V.O.) - Danielle Cormack
Aphrodite - Alexandra Tydings
King Glaucus - Clayton Moore
King Diomedes - Adrian Paul
Produced by: Gloriosus, HammerHead
As Aided and Abetted by Golden Mare, HammerHead, scout58, yarrielle,
bumper, Stroppy Lass, perk05.
Disclaimer:
Argo, Xena and Aphrodite are properties of MCA/Universal Studios and
Renaissance Pictures, no copyright infringement was intended. The
rest of the characters either belong to us, or to the Greek Mythologies.
Gross liberties were taken with the legends of the Mares of Glaucus,
and the Mares of Diomedes, but I hope that the gists, and some of the particulars,
of those legends have gotten through.